Love's shattered pride.

Tunes in my head: Twenty Four Hours by Joy Division
Atmosphere: Shattered. Utterly fucking shattered.

I might have emotional needs too.

When you needed me, I was there. I was there to talk, to give a shoulder to cry on.

And when I need you, what do you do?

You run away, and don't give me the support I need.

I was the only one to hold you up when you needed me.

You aren't getting anything compared to what I had to go through. You aren't getting the full brunt of the pain, the full onslaught. You're merely diluted.

I break my promise. I have regrets.

They need not be permanent. But they're becoming that way.

Please don't put me through this. If everyone says I'm such a good person, why are you CHOOSING to put me through this eternal torture?

I gave you absolutely everything. I gave you every shred of positive emotion that I had left. I gave so many things that I held dear to me in order to make you happy. I even betrayed myself, and my own moral beliefs just to give you more. I did absolutely everything for you that I could, and you chose to simply toss it all away as quickly as I willingly gave it? And you wonder why I'm the way I am. I gave everything I had left. And it obviously wasn't enough. It obviously wasn't enough to make you happy or to keep you in any capacity.

They say that love is like a cliff face. The soft parts are quickly eroded, leaving only the hard shell. It's true.

So this is permanence, loves shattered pride.
What once was innocence, turned on its side.
A cloud hangs over me, marks every move,
Deep in the memory, of what once was love.

Oh how I realised how I wanted time,
Put into perspective, tried so hard to find,
Just for one moment, thought Id found my way.
Destiny unfolded, I watched it slip away.

Excessive flashpoints, beyond all reach,
Solitary demands for all Id like to keep.
Lets take a ride out, see what we can find,
A valueless collection of hopes and past desires.

I never realised the lengths Id have to go,
All the darkest corners of a sense I didnt know.
Just for one moment, I heard somebody call,
Looked beyond the day in hand, theres nothing there at all.

Now that Ive realised how its all gone wrong,
Gottas find some therapy, this treatment takes too long.
Deep in the heart of where sympathy held sway,
Gotta find my destiny, before it gets too late.